I hate myself right now. I dont know what my fucking problem is. I just sit around my house all day and do nothing. I have been avoiding everyone... and I dont even really know why. I hate who I've become. I keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again and I dont listen to anyone! Everyone keeps telling me.. tells me over and over again until they are blue in the face and it goes in one ear and out the other. I am slowly but surely losing all the people that I really care about.. I miss all of my friends. Why am I pushing all of these people that actually care about me out of my life? Where is the old Kristeen? I was an idiot but I am an even bigger idiot now. I need to make some changes.. I dont want to be fighting with anyone anymore. I dont want to be fighting with EVERYONE right now. I feel like the whole world has turned its back on me. I dont like this at all.